The girl started to blur, no it wasn't the girl it was everything. A few seconds passed and he appeared in the aft section of a starfleet shuttle, along with the rest of the away team.
His head began to explode with images, he lifted himself into a sitting position in the corner, and placed his arms around his bent knees.
Visions of the Romulan girl swirled through his vision, her pleading look, her final breaths. Another vision appeared, this time of a girl from his past. "Arianna" he barely whispered. He started to hear voices of accusations, first it sounded like his parents, and then his close friends. "You are worthless, you let them DIE!, you are responsible Nathanial, you are Nathanial, YOU ARE NATHANIAL!" The voices screamed at him.
The voices quieted down until it was just one voice, it was a melodical voice, one he could not place. Slowly a face materialized infront of him, it was the Romulan girl. "You were meant to save me Nathanial, why did you not save me, what did I do to you that stopped you from saving me, why do you Hate me Nathanial, Why did you have to let me Die Nathanial, why did you let me die!!!!"
He tried to scream, but nothing came out, he was stuck there, immobile, while his soul was judged. The Romulan girl faded from his view, and with her her voice repeating "let me die" faded as well. He then heard a familiar voice, it sounded comforting. "It will be ok Nathanial" she said. "Its not your fault". He looked up and was confronted with a girl from his past. Her name was Arianna. She leaned over to comfort him. He rested his head on her breast, her sweet voice soothing him.
"You didn't do it on purpose Nathanial" she whispered. He looked up at her with a questioning stare.
"You're not to blame, you just weren't good enough to stop it." she said with a sad smile on her face.
He tried to speak, but she placed a finger over his lips.
"You aren't who you think you are, you can't save everyone, you are not as smart as you think you are." she accused, in her soothing voice. Nathanial shook his head. "I did try..." He whispered.
"No, no you did not Nathanial, if you had tried, you would have saved her." She stood up, her voice raising with every word "If you had tried, you would have saved ME!!!!!!" She yelled before de-materializing.
A tear rolled down his left cheek and down his neck. A second followed, and a third. He felt helpless... alone.
He heard an explosion, and what sounded like shouting, his consciousness returned to the current situation on hand. He had began to float, the artificial gravity no more.
He looked up, it was crowded, the shuttle was not meant to take this many normally. He shifted his gaze around the room, straight into the eyes of Sakarra.
She was addressing one of the Marines.
"Mister Warren. I am gratified to see you well. However, it is imperative that I access this panel behind you. Do you believe it is possible to rearrange your current position?"
The marines moved, but Nathanial was not paying attention, no his focus was on the Lieutenant. He watched her work and slowly the rest of the crew, and the shuttle disappeared, leaving only Sakarra in his view, and then she disappeared as well.
He was left a single thought process. What can you do? It asked him. What can you do? it asked him again. What can you... "Its not what, its why" Nathanial said interrupting the voice. His fathers words flowing back into his mind.
'Its not what you can do that's important son, its the reasons you do what you do that will make you who you are.' His father had told him.
And it rung true now, it didn't matter what he did or did not do, as long as the cause was right. And he knew what that cause was.
He had an entire crew to take care of, to help get through this perilous time, he had his science department to lead though this, he had his Captain to support, he had the crew to protect, Sakarra to protect.
Nathanial heard a loud crash, followed by the feeling of flying, before having his wind knocked out of him. The shuttle had landed in the Charon. He quickly composed himself and checked for any damage. Other than a potential bruise on his left elbow, he seemed alright. Standing up, he helped the rest of the away team towards the hatch and into the Charon proper.
Lieutenant Nathanial Doyle
Chief Science Officer
Chief Science Officer
USS Charon
